I didn’t do well for my fitness test today. My bench press sucks like shit. I’m disappointed with myself again. Why am I so weak? I’m training very hard to improve, but why. I know I wouldn’t give up so easily, but I’m sick of this kind of feeling. Why my mental keep being tested? I’m not very strong mentally! I might not give up now, but what about later? I’m not sure about myself either.

Sometimes, I just hate myself.